How to be Single During the Holidays


by Kay Winders

The holidays are a great time to be with the people you love. For many people, this means spending time with their husband or wife and their children. For many, it means spending time with their extended family, including those near and far.

For singles, the holidays can be a bittersweet time. It can be both a joyous time and a lonely time. By seeing everyone else with their spouses and their children, you may start dwelling on the fact that you are not with anyone. Add to that the inevitable questions, comments, or outright pressure you may face from family and friends about why you’re still single or just when you’re going to get married or have kids.

It doesn’t have to be this way. There are a few ways that you can get through the holiday season and make it just as fun and joyous not just in spite of your single status, but because of it. Here’s how to be single (and fabulous) at the holidays:

Spend Time with Other Singles

When you spend all your time with families and married couples, you may end up comparing your situation to theirs and feeling worse about your situation than you need to feel. You also might face the inevitable barrage of questions about your single status, which can annoy you and make you feel worse.

Don’t subject yourself to that. Instead, choose to spend the majority of your time around other singles. These are people who can commiserate with you about being single — or celebrate how fabulous it is to be single.

Attend Lots of Parties

Parties aren’t just a great way to celebrate the holiday season — they are also a great way to meet new people and to take your mind off things (like how you’re going to deal with your mother asking you why you still haven’t had a baby). You never know: You also just might meet someone fabulous at one of the parties!

Of course, not all parties are going to lift your spirits. If the invite comes from a married couple with kids, chances are that the other guests will also be married or have kids. Being around a lot of couples may only remind you of your single status — or bring obnoxious questions. Better to stick to parties with other singles, young people, or co-workers.

Host Your Own Party

Don’t wait to be asked to the dance — host your own! Hosting your own party can make you feel fun, popular, and loved — all the things you might not be feeling without a mate at your side during the holidays. Throw your own party and invite all your friends and co-workers. You’ll be too busy kissing under the mistletoe and singing Christmas carols to worry about why you’re single (or if it matters).

Have a Sense of Humor

Instead of getting defensive or angry at the inevitable questions you will get about your single status — “Do you think you’ll ever get married?” “Aren’t you worried it will be too late to have kids?” — adopt a sense of humor about it. Don’t honor the questions with genuine answers. Say things like, “No, I’m too young to get married” (even if you’re 50) or “Oh, man, I forgot that I need to have kids! I better make an appointment to do that next week.”

Of course, you’ll have to temper your humor for your audience. While you do want to deflect questions and make light of the situation, you don’t want to create a holiday rumble at the dinner table.

Remember the Benefits

One of the best ways to get through the holidays when you’re single is to remember all the reasons it’s great to be single. Think about it: You don’t have to argue about whose family you will visit for Christmas dinner. You don’t have to suffer unbearable in-laws. You can sleep in any day you want. You don’t have to put up a Christmas tree or decorations if you don’t want to. You can eat pumpkin pie and eggnog every day for breakfast if you want.

Being single means doing what you want when you want. Remember that and do something fun!

The holidays don’t have to be a lonely time or a dreaded time in which you subject yourself to even more questions about why you’re still not married. Use these tips to get you through the holidays so that it’s a fun and festive time for you, too — single or not.

How do you get through the holidays when you’re single? Share your tips in the comments!

About the Author: Kay Winders is presently the resident writer for www.badcreditloans.org, where she researches the best way for people to pay off their debts without damaging their credit. In her spare time, she enjoys freelance writing, the beach and gardening.

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