The Worst of The Greatrnk


All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling – Oscar Wilde

 

One day I was doing what I do best, which is being busy doing nothing, and basically minding my own business when someone who loves my blog (that is what she said) and is good looking (that is what I am saying) found it wise to ask me what inspires my writings. I decided to answer her in the form of, not one, but three posts! Yeah, I am cool like that. These posts will focus on my behind the scenes or what was going on through my not so smart thesaurus when I penned them down. Today I focus on the posts that did not make it: The worst of The Greatrnk.

 

1. El Fifa del World Cup

The title was supposed to look like a soap opera title. The inspiration behind that must have been Chiira’s Inflated Skins vs. Air Heads. At that time, I was less than a million seconds old in blogging and the only blogger I knew was the guy I mentioned above. It was a day to the start of The 2010 World Cup. I think the post is humerous. I must add, as I did in the post, that the questions were asked and answered in a South African Tourism Website. I even added a poll for people to vote for the country they think would win the World Cup. Most people, apart from me, thought Spain would win it, followed by Germany and Argentina. I do not think it deserves to be among my worst posts.

 

2. The Stock Market: Types of Stocks

This was my first real post, after the introductory post. The research that went to this post was enormous but I did not share it in the post. In researching, I learnt a lot about The Stock Market. I had planned on writing more posts on the stock market but somehow, that was not meant to be.

 

3. Top Ten

After two months of blogging, in which I wrote posts that at times sucked, I was wise enough to know that the only way to get better was to read and copy from what I read from other blogs. Remember when I started out I only knew one blogger. By this time, I had stumbled on blogs by the queen of twitter in .ke savvykenya, the funny itsnowrc, the not so noisy on twitter but talented writer sheblossoms, anyiko (Before I made the huge discovery later on that she was a celeb) and a few others. This post was my all time Top Ten best blog posts I had read. I am sure some of those post are not in my current top ten anymore, but these bloggers are still doing a great job. This is the best way to say the five bloggers mentioned thus far were my inspiration and mentors earlier on.

 

4. The World Cup…….as I Saw It

There were just three matches left to the end of the World Cup. I wanted everyone to know that I had all along known England and Argentina would not win the World Cup. The team I supported, Brazil had been kicked out, and I blamed Dunga for not calling up Ronaldinho. We all know what had happened to Ghana. Much of the Ghana disappointment is portrayed in the post.

 

5. Where Did The Vowels Go To?

I love this post, and it beats me that people did not relate to it. Facebook had introduced the “see more” feature where long updates were half posted with the option of clicking on the “see more” so as to see the update. As lazy as I am, I could not, and still cannot, get my fingers to click “see more” and I kept thinking why people kept on writing long updates. There was also the issue of shortening of words such that words no longer had vowels, which still infuriates me. And of course, the worst sin of all: The Laughing Out Loud or Lots Of Love acronym. The guys who use it fall in my List Of Losers!

 

6. Participants of the Stock Market

Just as the first post on The Stock Market, I did massive research on this post. It was a continuation of the first post. When I wrote it, I knew I would continue with the subject, which has not happened ever since. If I am not wrong, the next installment was to look at how stocks are valued. Maybe one day I will post something to the effect.

 

7. Int or Duction

This was the first post I ever wrote, which was to mark my triumphant entry into the world of blogging. I was so excited. I was just free styling and ended up with no words to end it. I like the post, even though someone once read it, compared it to what I am writing now and duly informed me that I had come from a far. I beg to differ, I have always thought I am getting worse at this writing business, but that is a story for another day.

 

Have a look at the posts and tell me if they deserve the punishment that is The Worst of The Greatrnk.

 

THE DAY’S

Quote: I said to my girlfriend, “Do you want to see me pull a really ugly face?” She laughed and said, “Go on then.” So I grabbed hers. – Anonymous

Bonus Story:

Mugabe’s Chauffeur ran over a pig. Mugabe asked him to go and tell the ranch owner what had happened. One hour later, he reappeared, staggering with crampy clothes, an unzipped trouser and champagne and a cigar on either hand.

Mugabe: What the … happened to you?

Chauffeur: The ranch owner gave me this champagne, the wife gave me the cigar and their 19 year old eer….

Mugabe: My God, and what did you tell them?

Chauffeur: I just went in and told them that I am Robert Mugabe’s Chauffeur and I have just killed the pig!

 

 

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11 thoughts on “The Worst of The Greatrnk

  1. For a split second, I panicked. I was like “He has a GIRLFRIEND!!!”

    Turns out I’m not psychologically prepared to start fighting over you so early in our relationship.

  2. Pingback: The Best of The Greatrnk « The Greatrnk

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