So much of life, it seems to me, is determined by pure randomness – Sidney Poitier
Once upon a time, MizCassandra suddenly (and out of the blue) had a
crush, I mean grudge against me and insisted that the only way I would get to heaven was by her forgiving me and the only way that would happen was by me doing one of two things on her birthday: Dedicating a whole post for her or getting her a BIG/EXPENSIVE gift! Being the good guy that I am, I decided to do neither. Then she tagged me in this post, paid people to kidnap me and they are now forcing me to write this post on her birthday! So you should all know that I am writing this under duress.
Basically, I am supposed to write eight
weird and/or random things about me that will make me look stupid before they let me go. Here goes:
1. When I am hungry, angry, bored, stressed, about to sleep, doing nothing, basically most of the time, I find myself sucking my tongue. I used to think I would stop the habit by the time I am old enough, then I stopped thinking. Oh, and I never ever sucked my thumb when I was small.
2. Behind my central incisors, there are other very small incisors. The dentists told me that they would disappear slowly with time. They were right, only they forgot to add the word ‘very’ between ‘disappear’ and ‘slowly’
3. If you want to torture me into telling you anything, just come with a syringe (do not bother getting a big one, just a small one). That is why I hate hospitals and self medicate myself when I am sick.
4. When I am stressed, I take chocolates. OK, it is Scientific, so do not look at me like I am responsible for making cocoa species in Ghana to become extinct. The level of stress is directly proportional to the bars of chocolates eaten.
5. I can almost multi-task. Let me rephrase that: I am better than the average guy and just fall short of the average girl in multi-tasking.
6. When I see a statement like “Am goin 2 kil smbdy who, whn its free 2 pst n’thn on fb or twitter, they stl shrtens wrds lyk they r bein chrgd” on any social site, I normally feel like throwing up or throwing my phone or monitor against a wall or floor, depending on what I am using. Why do people who are old enough to procreate insist on shortening everything they write?
7. I only like kids who are clean, sweet, not crying and who are being held by someone who happens not to be me. If by any chance you leave me with your kid, you will find them crying so that you do not make that mistake again.
8. I do not care about whether everyone calls it pessimism and say that it is bad, I will prepare for the worst possible outcome in all situations. There are people who do not believe there is a hell. I would rather believe there is one and find out there is none rather than believe there is none and find out there is one!
Bonus: A happy Birthday to MizMalaika aka MizCassandra (You can now tell them to let me go, I have done everything you have asked.)
Cool Blog: Me Myself and Isis
Quote: The world cannot end in 2012, I have a yoghurt that expires in 2013 – Papa Shango
I tag the following: No One