Katiba Bora or Bora Katiba


I get so turned off by the constitutional debate because it is a good document in the wrong hands – Mutahi Ngunyi

It is political season in Kenya again and it is the constitution in focus AGAIN! Is it not amazing how we have managed to recycle the same old policies, bundled and packaged them differently and then called it REFORMS? This is Kenya and wonders never cease!

I have read the proposed draft constitution and for starters I must say I was disappointed. I was hoping that Kenya is renamed Eyjafjallajokull. I mean with all the political heat we are generating, and the hot air coming from every corner, I’m sure that by now we have formed some ash cloud. I have got a feeling that by the time the referendum is coming round, planes will not be flying into Kenya! People… We have been told over and over again that we should all read the draft and then make informed choices! Well… for the sake of my good readers, I have read the draft and even went ahead and appointed my very C.o.E (Committee of Ex-f**ks) to asses the document on my behalf. YES…my former clandes have come up with a most beautiful document that will be used to do voter mis-education. The full document can be found on www.blowinghotair.info.ke. For now… I however found the following tit bits interesting…

THE CHURCH

Is it not interesting how the church almost always finds a way to twist the term “African culture”? Whenever it suits them, they throw in the African Culture and they think we have all forgotten that until recently, things as mundane as the African drum were not allowed in church! Let us not even get to the “Altar boys” saga… Now… the church-one of the countries largest landowner- is dictating to its flock that they must say a big NO to the draft constitution. If I take you back a few years… I remember the former president having a rough time with the church over the issue of condoms. The former president said that he was a president of both “Christians and drunkards”. The church was quick, efficient and sharp in its response. They first corrected the former prez (MO1 who is siding with them now) that the opposite of Christians was not drunkards and then went ahead to bash the whole issue of condoms saying the former prez was advocating for an immoral citizenship! QUESTION… assuming we were to have had a referendum on condoms back then, which side do you think the church would have leaned on? How many politicians would have joined in the church bandwagon? YEAH… To the church, I simply say, “You have failed to read the tide and keep with the times of the ever changing population. You have your heads buried so deep in your backside that you cant see the obvious…

ABORTION

Now…if you thought I’d become an erstwhile campaigner for YES… well, you are THINK AGAIN! I am strictly PRO CHOICE. I advocate for women’s rights. My disappointment here goes to the ever vocal FIDA. They are forever quick to jump to the fore when it comes to matters dealing with senior politicians-remember they made a name through the “baba Dennis” fiasco-but when it came to women’s rights in the constitution, they went silent! My thinking is that, the FIDA top cream thinks its well positioned politically because of the number of positions now available to women. They are silently eyeing a spot in the top echelons of government! I would have assumed that FIDA would have stood up for women’s rights as relating to matters of abortion. Instead, we have only heard from a bunch of men-the church-and another bunch of men-gynecologists! One reason I just might vote NO… is because abortion has not been legalized. Yes I have said! LEGALIZE ABORTION! How many women struggle with choices of child birth? Why bring someone into this earth that you know you can not take care of? Give the modern woman a choice. Give young girls a choice and chance. Educate them on the risks involved and the effects of abortion. Give them a good and decent choice. What we have instead, is young girls being mis advised by peers and going to back street and dingy clinics to get abortions done. I dare ask my women… ”If you want to get an abortion, would you know where to get one?” Chances are…you will say YES. So why again were women bullied by the church into submission? Why did women not put up a strong fight towards the legislation of abortion? Give women a right to choose is what I say. It may not be morally correct, but it is what it is! Why give up on this fight now? Let your voice be heard in the ballot. And by the way…the most moronic argument I’ve heard so far against the constitution is that “Just because abortion is happening, doesn’t mean we make it legal. Just because bank robberies happen, doesn’t mean we make bank robberies legal”. YOU THINK????

GAY RIGHTS

Before you think I ‘swing that way’ let me state upfront that I play for the team with different equipment! The politicians say we are making a constitution for the generations to come. Lets face it people, as things stand NOW, the number of gays and lesbians in our country is huge. Yet, we choose to take a moral high ground and assume that they don’t exist! Well…THEY DO! Guys in the coast have been doing the bendover in the open for years. Why make gays and lesbian sound like some secret mythical society out to destroy the world? I honestly don’t give a hoot what another man like up his rear end. I don’t care what objects he is down for. I do however care, that he gets his right to insert a coke bottle if he so chooses! Besides, if we make it legal, can you imagine the number of tourists who’d come to Kenya on a gay honeymoon? And guys, think of the lesbian women who on holiday would want to experiment with a third party. All said, I agree with Eminem when he says “theirs no reason why a man and another cant elope”!

KADHI’S COURTS

How and why again is this contentious? My ‘Committee of Ex-f**ks‘ interviewed twenty Christians and none of them could pick out exactly where a Kadhi’s court in Kenya is located! So again I ask… why is it contentious?

MAKMENDE

My sources reliably inform me that Kenyans wanted ‘Makmenday’ to be a public holiday and a national symbol! Politicians are not telling us the truth. They fear that this man spoken of in soft tones and in dark corners will eclipse them. I demand that the government calls me as Makmende’s representative and personal assistant, so that we can negotiate. I believe there is still time and that ‘Makmende’ is a contentious issue in the draft constitution. I suggest that parliament bows to the demands of the people and immediately reconvenes to insert a ‘makmende’ clause. Things are beginning to look rather grim. Who do you think inserted the words “NATIONAL SECURITY” in the draft published by the AG? It was Makmende…but do not tell anyone!

My dear fellow Kenyans, it is decision time again. I however think that we assume that a new constitutional dispensation is the “Be all, end all” of all our problems. FACT is, if we can not obey simple traffic rules, if we can not obey building codes, if we still find it easier to drink, drive and bribe rather than take a taxi…then how on earth will we adopt an entirely new set of laws? A change in minds and attitudes is what is first needed. As someone once said… ‘Do not first start by asking if we’ve got human rights. Start by asking if we’ve got the right humans’. My question… do we have the right kind of people in Kenya? Well… I still insist, lets first rename our country Eyjafjallajokull!

The above was not written by greatrnk and the views contained, especially the crossed ones are not necessarily those shared by greatrnk. Please let me know, using decent language, how you are going to vote (GREAT OR RNK, I mean GREEN OR RED) in the comments section.

THE DAY’S:
Quote: The only time a woman wishes that she were a year older is when she is expecting a baby.

Big Tune: Alicia Keys featuring Jimmy Cozier – Mr. Man.

Hero/Zero: bee – I just realized that most of the people I know whose names start with the letter B are very Proud and she is no different. Do I know her that well? RED! Is she a good person and friend? GREEN!

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2 thoughts on “Katiba Bora or Bora Katiba

  1. first, have to say, love your blog!!

    then,just a little comment about the whole constitution thing, particularly the abortion part,,

    I’m a girl, and i’ve always thought that women should have the right to choose and all that. However, after battling with this issue for a while now, I realised that abortion isn’t the solution. Women do have the right to choose who they wanna be making babies with.I imagine that having a baby is much bigger thing than what the woman wants, at that point her choice is irrelevant because the baby already exists

    • Thanks Cherry48 for dropping by.

      I agree with you that abortion is not the solution. But there are cases of rape for example that create a crisis. Keeping the baby will be a constant reminder of what one went through.

      All in all, if you ask me, the effects of abortion outweigh the memories brought about by an unplanned child. Abortion, is not the solution.

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