If modesty and candor are necessary to an author in his judgment of his own works, no less are they in his reader – Sarah Fielding
One day when I was busy doing nothing but basically minding my own business, someone ambushed me and was intent on making me tell her what inspires me to write, probably so that it could inspire her too. It is then that I decided to do The Worst of The Greatrnk, a post that looks at what went through my mind when I wrote the posts that did not make it. Today, I decided to go through what drugs were in my head when I wrote the posts that some of you came to love and/or hate.
The Harsh Reality Finally Sinks is a continuation of Kapenguria 6…..Sorry, I Mean Buru 7. I was meant to post part three of it but my good friend laziness took me on a trip to the country where he is king. This story is based on a true story, even though some elements are fictional. The two posts rank as number 10 and 6 respectively in the all time best of The Greatrnk.
I had seen bloggers write ‘Letters to their 13 year old them’ and (un)fortunately, no one tagged me in any. After reading several of these posts, I realised that most bloggers loved writing and reading when young. I, on the other hand, loved mathematics. I decided to do a post on what I loved at age 13: Mathematics, or as I called it, Math Hate Matics.
What is the probability that your 600th follower works in the same building as you and you have never known? OK, let me steer away from mathematics. When she asked me what inspires me to write, I at first did not have an answer. Then I decided to do this post that is boring you and of course The Worst of The Greatrnk.
When I won a blog contest, barely 4 months old in blogging
(Memo to those who hate me: been there, done that, won awards and stuff. You cannot touch me!!!) I was so happy and did not even know the best way to express myself. When the competition started, I was doing badly, and I thought if only I will be among the top 5, then it would be a great achievement. Shock on me, I Won! Really!
So we are into the top 5 posts. One day, I was heading home in a mat. The lady who sat next to me had a sick child. To cut the long story short, half way through the journey, the kid somehow produced 5 litres of puke from I do not know where and made sure 98.76% of it was on me. I at least restrained my fist from making contact with the face of both the mom and the kid at a speed likely to rival the speed of light in a vacuum. Later, I thought about what we go through and what just makes us feel like cursing and
SOL (Screaming Out Loud). I figured out there are a million things that make me feel like multiplying the dental formulaes of people by zero, so I decided to narrow Is She It to a relationship post.
I was blog whoring Chiira’s Blog when I saw (his sort of) review/recommendation of (I think) Kate Bomz‘s Blog. His final words in the post: “Just Maybe could turn out to be my weekly blog review. Am yet to decide that but keep watching for that.” 5 months after this proclamation, he had not started this review. Infact, he is yet to start to date. This got me thinking that I could start the same, but do it in form of a package that includes an interview of a blogger, a review of his/her blog, a guest post from him/her and finally, write a post in his/her style. Unfortunately, the furthest I ever went was my Interview of Savvy Kenya who (I now find out) was coincidentally the first person to comment on Chiira’s Just Maybe post. (Small world, this is).
A few hours after Deestinguished did this post, DR did this other one and, me being a good guy that I am, decided to speak out for the good guys out there. At first, when I saw DR’s post, I thought it was a counter to Deestinguished’s post, only to be ‘disappointed.’ For those who know Deestinguished, they know that the post was written two weeks to her birthday, and I have always wondered how many birthday gifts she missed from the good guys who read that post. My response was the much acclaimed Bad Is The New Good.
A few days to Valentines Day, I did one of my best post. We were trying to convince someone that he had to do ‘something’ for his ‘girlfriend’ or else he would lose her forever! (Just to mention that he did nothing, not even a text, and he has not lost her. Either there are still some good non-materialistic girls out there or there are some lucky bustards out there, me things!) The girls in the group gave their views of the perfect valentines package gifts (note the plural in the word gift and the word package!!!), and I noticed that there are things that guys take for granted that offend girls. I figured that there might be things that we hold dear (I did not use that word, did I?) that girls have no clue of. The result was this post. (not this one you are reading, but the one I am talking about.) After coming up with the draft, I asked Kevmotz, NdubiAbenga and Jose to chip in. I am very grateful for their input. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present my favourite post, The Score Sheet.
The Score Sheet, for some reason, does not make it to number one. One day, I was in an M-pesa shop (trying to sell goats for those who are stupidly curious of what someone like me would be doing there), when I heard two guys talk like it was illegal to be intelligent (literary) about Actuarial Science. A few days later, when from lunch with a colleague, we talked about the profession and how challenging it is to qualify etc. I did some research (a little) and came up with 4 Facts of Actuarial Science. What I love most about this post are the comments. They always make my day.
There you have it, my best 10 posts. Let me know which is your best post in the comments section.
Quote: Love thy neighbour all through the day… but first make sure her husband’s away!